A few days I saw something on social media that got my attention (I know, I know…). It was a photo collage. A famous actor posing at the age of 60 something, versus a much younger version of herself, same pose. The caption and an invitation for people to chime in was a something like ‘do you agree she’s just as sexy now at the age of …’.
The reason it got my attention is because aging is having a moment on social media and in the public discourse, if you will, and it’s not all good or healthy, in my opinion. Yes, I am all about healthy aging, or aging healthfully, whatever way you want to think of it. And feeling sexy can and should be a part of it. But there’s so much that goes in that one concept that puts the emphasis on the outside and on posing rather than living it.
Posing versus living (and believing it too)
Well, you might say, that’s social media for you, wouldn’t you know that by now. Yes, I do, and that’s one of the big (BIG) reasons why I find myself considering the option of taking a break or dropping it altogether. Not yet, and it’s a subject for another day.
Back to the posing versus living. In this case it’s about looking sexy in older age, but let’s take it beyond that and straight into a conversation about intrinsic versus extrinsic motivation.
Why intrinsic motivation matters for healthy aging
Intrinsic motivation enables us to find ways to stick to workout routines, diet patterns and a certain lifestyle which ultimately maintains and improves our health, increases strength and mobility and also cardiovascular health. Our bodies are changing in myriad ways and most of them are not great, let’s be honest. Women have the double whammy of aging and going through the menopause journey. Physically, emotionally, socially (big time!), time passing leaves prints.
Our physical appearance changes, and while each person’s journey is unique, we all lose muscle mass and strength. Some of that lean mass tissue is replaced by fat tissue. Yay. On top of that, we slow down. We move less, and we often indulge a bit more in comfort foods. We’re more confident in some ways, and perhaps less in others. Physical appearance may be one. But aside from the way we look, the risk of certain conditions associated with aging is also increasing. Cardiovascular disease, metabolic conditions including type2 diabetes, dementia, cancer, osteoporosis and yes, depression too. Family history has a say in it, but lifestyle (modifiable factors, as it were) have a much bigger say.
Bringing it together
When we come across examples (whether real or not, that’s another story) of people our age looking a certain way it can be both depressing or inspiring. And this latter one can go two ways. It can push some to do whatever it takes to look a certain way, and they might start dieting for example (please don’t). Maybe they’ll start an exercise routine, and because think weight loss, they often go for cardio exercises which can ‘melt away’ the pounds (it’s not the way to go, as you may already know from my other posts or newsletters). If the motivation is mostly extrinsic, such as reaching a physical appearance goal, there’s an end in sight. If we manage to reach the goal and the transformation becomes a catalyst to keep on going (not the dieting part, please!) than that’s great. Often times though, we lose steam and return to old habits, having the confirmation that we can do it, or get close enough to doing it.
Visible vs. barely visible results
However, sometimes we don’t see results for a while, or we see some but nowhere near the goal we set our eyes on and …well, we lose steam and get demoralized.
With intrinsic goals, however, and yes, they can include looking and feeling good, we engage on a different journey. We find a pace that works in the long-run, we are willing to challenge ourselves and also understand that there will be setbacks, and most of all, we know that it will be a process. Progress will happen, but maybe not in the ways we have experienced it in our younger bodies. But we are still willing to get going and most importantly, keep going, with all that in mind.
Why?
The million-dollar question, isn’t it?
It’s not because we want to look sexy (again, nothing wrong with that and yes, it is a consequence of being consistent in one’s exercise and eating routines… just saying 😊).
It’s because we want our bodies to be strong, nimble and capable, able to do the things our minds dream of. And yes, our minds are better when we adopt a lifestyle that helps us age healthfully – another big bonus.
It’s also because we want to live independently, reduce our risk of chronic conditions associated with aging and enjoy every single day like the precious gift that it is.